.: Inanity turns Insanity :.

Because someone kicked me...

2009-11-14T21:07:43Z

... or rather, I was kicked by the promise...
Ok, I was oblidged to write it after dealing with my evening coffee. very first I had for maaaaany weeks.

Title: Devotion
Words: 475, a drabble
Series: Saiyuki, as always
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: hints of Ukoku/Kami-sama

He will look down at the creature, pulling at his white robes with its dirty limbs, burring its dirty digits into silk. The black-haired will stare into those eyes in the colour of mixed dust and mist, dull and miserable-looking, just like their poor owner. His torn and dirty clothes, his scars and bruises...
Boy didn't seem to own those eyes anyway, but rather borrow or got them second-hand or even stole from the small market's stand like an apple or piece of old cheese.

Not like the creamy, honey brown ones he was foolishly expecting to find a copy of.
It wasn't even a matter of comparing the two. It would feel like the worst kind of desecration for him, to begin with.

The boy was pale, in the chalk-pale meaning of this word, completely not worth considering as healthy or soft – the fair kind he'd rather enjoy to look at. But who was he to ask for something unable to get here, in the middle of absolute Nowhere? And the ill-wheat coloured hair... Disgusting, hiding the disfigured part of the face, something close to a burn. His very own person rose a great controversy without anyone's help, not to mention hanging out with the child-beggar...
Then the trust beaming from boy's dull eyes made them shine. Hope made his cheeks turn rosy.
And the words made HIM turn to the child with a smile.
- Would you like to buy me, God?

Devotion.

Maybe someday he'd use it.

- Dear God..?

Maybe in years the boy will grow up to turn into adolescent, with healthy body, slender and powerful. Maybe someday his hair will reach angora wool's softness, skin will be delicate and porcelain-like, the way of the finest silk. The eyes will remain dull, miserable and lonely, but he will call...

- Master?

“What?”
Someday this game will become slightly annoying, more and more each day. Just like with the other playthings he had owned.

- Can you tell me... Does God exist?

Brow will rise as he'll hear the question.
The boy – a young man now - will turn his face to the window, wondering and waiting for the answer in complete silence, just like he was taught to.
The robes will still lay around his naked body like petals around the flower's calyx, offered to be looked at and its fruit to be slowly consumed, bite by bite. The beads of sweat will run down his skin, so fragrant with scented oils.
So full of sin.

“I believe not.”

He will turn his gaze from the night and drapes, wide-eyed as the doors will be moved, as they will slide and then close shut. And he'll be left alone among his toys, these old and new ones.
Again.

'Till the next time.
Or the last, maybe.

AKMeme reveal..?

2009-09-25T11:12:33Z

I am not alive.

And I will have no life unless I will have.

Title: The Rest is Silence
Author: adi_san (aka AnonWriterLol)
Fandom: Saiyuki
Pairing: Gojyo/Hakkai
Warnings: slight necrophilia, character death, angstfluff
Autor's note: Gojyo's POW. Written for Anonymous Kinky Meme IV for the prompt on page 6. It came out to be... weird. Sorry.

Terrible fic under the cut.

The Rest is Silence

He’d never thought it was going to end like that.
The heart which bore a feeling for him, a friend’s heart stopped.
An accident, right before his eyes.
He will be so lost and forgotten from now on.

He was too slow. Shakujo’s chain curled in the other way and now he ends up howling to the setting sun like a beast, seeming like his youkai half had awoken in him. Down on his knees before the bloody mess, a tangle of aggressors’ limbs cut off with the half-moon blade of his sacred weapon, he cries out to the sky, cursing gods, all the people, youkai and himself.
Too fucking slow! One slight move from his side and Hakkai would be alive now.
Alive. Now.
Still with him.

A feeling of guilt, sorrow and sadness spread through his veins. He thought that he’d forgot how to cry long time ago. But the tears kept running and shakujo disappeared all of sudden. The mess it had created still remains. The body that it did not protect lingers as well.
– Let’s go – a cold voice announced, his owner stepping beside him in his shitty holy robes.
The fucking monk didn’t give a damn about it.
Gojyo gritted his teeth and looked at him.

And so he laid, spread on the meadow’s, few feet away from the youkai’ torn corpses. Last strong sunrays were dancing on his auburn hair as he kept smiling with his eyes closed. The expression looked so natural, not like the fake smile he’d worn sometimes. So peaceful, despite the bloody wound that rested on his chest. An arrow shot was so accurate, that it had pierced his cloth, got between ribs, aiming for the heart, going inside almost to its fletching.
Achieving the goal.
Effortless.
The pierced heart panicked and started pumping healer’s blood like crazy. But this time out of rhythm with body. It got so tired afterwards.
That’s why it stopped.
It needed a rest.
No artificial pacemaker available.

– Get your sorry ass moving, you stupid kappa! – the voice called again, angry as its owner had to deal with uneasy-questions-asking monkey.
– Fuck you, shitty monk! – his mouth formed in response – I don’t give a damn about this fucking road of yours! Fuck, fuck, fuck… – he bowed his head to the ground as his own voice turned into whisper – Why? – the puddle of blood underneath sobbed with him.
– Why? – the sky above asks miserably.
He found his eyes looking at the purple-violet clouds, then around him. Monk and monkey were nowhere to be seen. Not with him anymore.
He was alone.

He was only with him, he thought, looking down at the pretty, pretty face he’d always loved. From a distance.
His lips were surprisingly warm against his. It felt like he was alive despite his death. If only he could be with him... Stand in place, make up some time.
Short brown strands were soft and warm as well. Setting sun was casting a riot of colours to glisten on them. But Gojyo was certain that healer would be displeased seeing the blood and mud stains on his new jeans. Good that his eyes were closed.
Good that he was asleep so prettily with his cheeks so smooth beneath his own calloused hands. Fingers yellowed where he usually kept his cigarette. Hakkai didn’t like it as well.
He liked stuff all swept, ironed and clean.
Now he lies in a mess himself.
And his clothes will get dirty.

Gojyo kept unbuttoning healer’s Chinese tunic, trying not to get it dirty. He would be upset, so very upset. Then, he would have to arrange another laundry and ironing day. And he didn’t like it as much as reading, cooking meals for the two of them or making some aromatic tea.
He wanted to run a tea-house after their journey, didn’t he?
Oh, and a small garden on the back of the lot, with fruit trees and all the other nice things.
His skin was as soft as he remembered it to be first day they’ve met. Gojyo had to fix the man, put his innards back. It almost felt the same.
He had to help his Hakkai.

The wooden arrow’s core broke easily in his hand, so he threw it away. A filthy thing it was, with the dark black-and-red feathers, resting in healer’s chest. It’d pierced his favourite tunic and shirt. Gojyo hoped to, at least, rescue clothes from the mud.
Tracing fingers along the exposed neck, he tried to remember. All the nights he’d spent watching his healer sleeping in his bed. He had him within hand’s reach.
Now the figure was vulnerable, lukewarm, but not so alive.
Suddenly, he heard a quiet sob as he kissed the slender neck. Something warm and wet slid down his cheek as his Hakkai’s sweet taste clung to his tongue. It almost felt the same when he did it the last time, when healer was asleep.
He was a bit drunk then, but the taste was unforgettable.
It lingered in his mind.
It called to him.

A soft sigh escaped Hakkai’s lips as he’d laid his head on his healer’s bare chest, trying to calm himself. It sounded so pleased, that he smiled. He’d loved him from the very beginning. Loved his fiery eyes and red hair and bachelor habits. But he’d folded Hakkai’s clothes well on his lap, hadn’t he?
He was the only one that he had been loved by. And his mouth was so welcoming, his lips so tender, his tongue so sweet.
He imprinted himself in Gojyo’s heart as a beautiful memory.
He died as a happy man, aware of his duties and loved.
The scar on his stomach was so soft, it tasted great on his tongue, pink flesh so visible against the overall paleness of the body.
Gojyo closed his eyes, just to look into Hakkai’s green ones.
– Such a lovely colour for you – he heard himself whisper huskily against the healer’s zipper.
How could he forget about the pants? They were in light colour, that Hakkai called ecru or beige, depending on his actual mood. He would be upset if they will be stained red.
They already were, the bottom of legs had had a random youkai blood on it. What a filthy creatures they were, bleeding all over healer’s pretty clothes.

Trying to fold the pants, he looked around. Silence was strangely growing around them. It seemed like forest clearing was mourning with him. No birds were singing around, not even a sound of crow crying out nor rustle of leaves as deer came nearby. Nothing, as he lowered himself over his friend’s body.
Nothing, as he whispered stupid confessions and love spells and pleas into his healer’s lips, before kissing them.
It’s all he could give him now. No one will fill the hole in his heart from now on.
Hakkai was the one who would ever fit in that place.
And now he got none. And it becomes a disappointment.
No hope anymore, no love, nothing to live and try for.
But he offered his body willingly, even if the soul had flown away from it, the sweetness of old one-sided romance remained. Such a waste of feelings it could be.
Skin on his groin tasted like sugar, milk and honey. Sweet aroma was clinging to his cooling flesh just to be lapped from it by a hungry tongue. His legs, numbly spread wide open, waiting to be caressed, kissed and claimed. All the things he didn’t reach while being alive.
All the things he could get, saying one word.

– It seems to be the easiest… – he’d said, turning to redhead mate, his green eyes glistening in the dim lamplight – … and probably the safest way.
Then he’d granted him a sweet smile, one of his wonderful-but-fake ones.
– If I were with you, you might be already dead.
Standing up from the bed, completely naked, he’d said clearly that he needed to take the shower alone. He didn’t even look back at him. Maybe he was too drunk anyway.
Well, it was probably easier and safer…
He’d closed his eyes and ignored it.

Healer’s muscles were relaxed and loose. Nothing seemed to get in his way to claim what needed to be his. What already belonged to him in his dreams.
Folded clothes laid neatly on the stone nearby as he kneeled between those pretty legs, tasting scar tissue under his tongue. It was all he’d got now. The one he was late to love spread beneath him, ready and willing.
He took him easily, only opening his zipper to acknowledge, in astonishment, that he was hard. Inside was still warm. Not as warm as the living soul would be, but pleasant enough.
Hakkai was his. Always. Forever.
Even if he didn’t know what was going on with his feelings, his body managed to know it well, achieving a steady rhythm.
Yes, the skin was like honey, so pale, almost blue against his own. His skin was like the moonlight, an ideal form that came out right from his dreams. The intoxicating, sweet aroma mixing with the smell of sex made his heart ache even more. Gojyo buried his face into his mate’s chest again and cried out as he came.
A soft sigh escaped healer’s lips as well as a thick trail of blood ran down his cheek. He lowered himself over again and gently kissed it off.

Moments later he stood up and zipped, hearing the loud growl behind him. The rustling of leaves became more and more bothering. Gojyo reached out his hand, but shakujo didn’t want to appear this time. It had lost the reason to appear.
He’d lost the person to fight for.
He’d lost the one to protect.
Smirking, he heard the bows being drawn.
– Sorry to keep you waiting – he whispered, bending his head down as arrows were being released.

- Hjartað Hamast, Sigur Ros
- Blue, A Perfect Circle
- Si, Pati Yang

adi_san @ 2009-06-30T16:56:00

2009-06-30T15:06:29Z

A tag... Again.

Firstly: If you've been tagged, you must write your answers in your own LJ and replace any question that you dislike with a new, original question.
Secondly: Tag eight people. Don't refuse to do that. Don't tag who tagged you.

01. Make a list of 5 things you can see:
- rubber
- red hairbrush
- paper folder
- black mascara
- "pepsi" pencil sharpener

02. Would you ever get plastic surgery?
I wonder... I really don't know.

03. What kind of magazines do you read?
"Focus" and "WiZ" - something all scientific and so on.

04. What's your occupation?
Nothing right now. And I'm afraid it would be nothing...

05. Do you nap a lot?
No.

06. What was your first celebrity crush?
Leonardo Di Caprio - after watching Titanic two times...

07. What's your current fandom/obsession/addiction?
Fandom: random Minekurish
Obsession: Flowers. My plant-pots...
Addiction: Internet.

08. What are you listening to right now?
Bomfunk MC's - Freestyler

09. What food could you eat every day for weeks and not get sick of?

Pasta.

10. What websites do you always visit when you go online?
DeviantART, Nightwood, Valenth, Ikkou-RP forum, Gmail, Waneko forum

11. What was the last thing you bought?
New blouse. Just an hour ago.

12. What was the cutest thing you've seen today?
Saiyuki MAD made on Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei's opening.

13. Does the weather affect your mood?
Yes, very much.

14. What is your zodiac sign?
Sagittarius

15. Do you want to learn another language?
Japanese or Chinese.

16. Would you like to get married one day?
Yes, of course.

17. Do you have any siblings?
No. I'm an only child.

18. What's something you'd like to say to someone right now?
To all the people that supported me - "Sorry that I've failed you"

19. What are your looking forward to?
Getting on university.

20. Say something to the person who tagged you:

Youlittlecreepypineapplelovingfreak...

Giftrade~!

2009-05-28T09:50:08Z

Once again a thing grabbed shamelessly from edyna

I will send a handmade gift to the first ten people who leave a comment requesting to join this Pay It Forward exchange. I don't know what that gift will be yet, but I promise you will receive it within 365 days. The only thing you have to do in return is "pay it forward" by making a similar agreement on your journal.

Be prepared to think about what do you want from me.
I accept every postcard, art or even a short(?) fanfic request.
The information about this journal will be cross-posted to DeviantArt too, I think.

I'll have some time from now.
Early holidays FTW.

Fandom Tag

2009-05-11T18:39:16Z

Got it from edyna , while commenting her journal. She'd chosen fandoms for me.

01: What got you into this fandom in the first place?
02: Do you think you'll stay in this fandom or eventually move on?
03: Favorite episodes/books/movies/etc.?
04: Do you participate in this fandom (fanfiction, graphics, discussions)?
05: Do you think that more people should get into this fandom?

Saiyuki

1 - To be honest, becoming such a SaiyukiTard and getting deep into the fandom was caused by cosplay. A stupid information that "You are going to Magni, Ad! It's only three weeks from now! 8D"... FU Kana. I was buying manga earlier, but I hadn't been such a fan.
2 - I will stay. Definately! It's still on-going series (I mean Reload and Gaiden) and I came to love the plot twists, characters, art in later volumes and the autor. I don't know why though. Fandom makes all mangas better. Now I'm trying to get artbooks. Hehe... They've named me a SaiyukiTard, so they have one!
3 - Saiyuki Gaiden vol4 chap27-33... ~~No comments!~~
4 - Roleplays, lots of ~~stupidboringugly~~ fanarts, wallpapers, ~~lol~~cosplays, drabbles and one fanfic!fail... So, no I do not participate *sarcasm* To be honest, I want to get rid of that mini-obsession of mine. Working on no-saiyuki fanarts now ~~and failing miserably~~.
5 - More people from my country. In USA the amouth is right enough, even too big, but I'd really want to talk in normal language about Saiyuki. Seriously, I mean talk and share opinions. And fanscream a bit, not only at the sight of my plushie Hakuryuu.

Wild Adapter

1 - Scanlations at the polish scan-site. MangapolisPlatinum it was? Hmm... Dunno. I'd found Honeycomb and thought "Gosh, that's got similar art as Saiyuki" and link by link by thread and author's name, I came to the scan-site with WA. Love it. Have it. A pity than in engRish.
2 - I will be soooo faithfull. Especially, that dice 46 is on and Makoto looks so sweet as a junior high student! I hope to stay in this fandom for a long time. It's cool and not-well-known here in pl. Another plus that's slightly shonen-aish, action-packed and with a slight dose of good humour. Makoto's "LOL" rulez... I know, spoilers. Deal with'em!
3 - Vol6 and official trailer. Plus immortal Shiritsu Araiso Koutougakkou Seitokai Shikkoubu (Executive Committee) >xDDD ~~I just love this kickass title! !hat a lol indeed~!~~
4 - Commenting other's works, some fanarts... And the shirt. Definately the shirt! The shirt is a must! And wearing a tiny ponytail while working in glasses. ~~Homecosplay ftw.~~
5 - Hmm... That's a hard question. I think that'd be cool to have somebody to talk with about these series. But I think, that I have such people around, maybe not so close but enough. I know that f.ex. cosplay or arts wouldn't be recognised as easily as Saiyuki (especially cosplay)...

X/1999

1 - First. Fandom. Ever. Forever. And it's all my friend, Radzio's fault. He borrowed me volumes of X/99, because he thought that as a girl I would enjoy such "thing". Oh, how he knew that I would... I did. Very much. And now it's a disease, a parasite that lives in my brain and spreads into veins... I curse and I love you, Radziu!
2 - It would be the last fandom that I would betray. The last. Don't the layout say enough for itself? This fandom is my primal love. And I mean it literally. I've got no more words. Maybe it's a stupid, creepy apocalypse-tiem-nao manga, but I love it. Sthu if you think otherwise.
3 - "Very hard" question... Of course it's vol 16. Yes, I love that creepy-good-for-nothing-omg-dark-bastard-murderer-with-issues character, but sthu again plz.
4 - I love the fandom! Even if it's so silent and almost-dead. I'm not an active participant, but I really enjoy arts, doujins, wallpapers or news from it. Every single one.
5 - I need to talk with my friend about it more. She's the only one I need to enjoy the bright and dark sides of this fandom; to explore and adore it more. ~~Ket, I need you... ;____; My true love!~~

By the way, I was writting biology today.
I don't know how to feel about it. I don't know how it will be... Bad, good or worse-than-you-have-ever-imagined?
And now I feel mentally exhausted.
I need to know how to sew on sewing-machine. I've even announced it to my mom. Let her bear this thought in mind... Poor, old sewing-machine!

Pointless infos of doom

2009-04-27T11:01:46Z

Ok!

To begin with...
Today morning my mom found another university on which I need only chemistry and biology results to get in. They'd changed the demands this year. This means - no physics! Yay for me as I'm passing only bio and chem on expanded!
But it's Gdańsk... (Or Białystok..? D8). And this means plus 10hours by car from here. I'm in the centre of Poland and this thing is up near the sea.
Splendid.

I still aim to go to Poznań though. It's almost as far as Gdańsk (yeah, almost makes a difference >xD)... But It's a really nice town and I've got coleagues on Japanese studies there... I want to go there. Italian restaurant there is ftw! Me wants!
But I have to learn, learn and learn even more to get enough points from exam to apply there... The pressure is unbelieveable, even if I got the special promotion (ja i pasek w ostatniej klasie, lol...).
I will do it!

I WILL PIERCE THE HEAVENS~!

Another thing to say...
Yesterday I've made a final decission...
I must lost weight.

Yeah, totally like this. Big, in bold and underlined.

I think that Ritsuka cosplay is in a current "Will be made on 100%" mode now. Still I think that I'll modify it slightly to fit my tastes.
I've ordered the black gloves... About 44cm long. Went to buy a black top (and a tanktop) in suitable size(s) today. I've got the ears and everything... Minus the tail, which I must think about more. Boots? Hmm... Glany! Army-boots, yahoo! Or my longer 'pseudo-glan' ones xD And sweet, long, black lace stockings... Must think about the pants/shorts/panties/whatever. Hmm... Dye hair, or not to dye'em? :P
Yup, I'm uncovering my oh-so-not-known cosplay.
To be honest, I had to resign from first-planned version -> this one with long-sleeved black turtleneck and a green short-sleeved blouse and normal pants.
- Why?
It was shown on a convention this year. And it was Magnificon7. A quite well-known con, on which all cosplay was filmed and put on YouTube... And photos (of course) on acp... *sighs* No way I'm duplicating it.
Quoting my friend, Mallary: "om nom nom shota cosplay XD"
Indeed.
(I know that I overuse this word)

I wish that the nice guy from "Farmland" will resume his activity and start to import these #$*&%# elven ears...
For me, that is... I'd be very grateful.

The 'Last Pierni' in plans (cash gathering now!), ~~'Fune' in major plans (1h busride from my town, must go)~~ and 'Animatsu' too (because we all love Warsaw xD).
(*this will be not understandable for non-polish ppl, but I assure you that these are the cons' names)

I know I should be doing a chemistry test-sheet now... And a bio one...
*goes to take a shower*

Happy Easter

2009-04-12T10:43:00Z

Happy Easter
Everyone!

Cosplay plans 2009

2009-03-28T15:52:35Z

Multitag journal entry. Because I'm too lazy to rewrite it both on dA and LJ...
Will only make a LJ entry about this thing and link it further.

Do you think posting my 58 DJ after "pimping up" bg on pages 1-4 is a good idea? Or just keep it for myself or Tadaima.
I don't know what I'm doing it for, since she ignores it. And me.

Fuck it.

I've already got my reload!Hakkai outfit and completed the outfit for Tenpou some time ago.

I'm still thinking about cosplaying Ritsuka with Fusia-chan as Soubi. She loves Loveless, so maybe I'll talk her into it. I don't know, but I want to wear my new homemade cat-ears. Must find better thing for ail though. A big black boa?

And another problem - what outfit. I can't decide between this one and that one... Or maybe this..?

Small but Evil Cosplay Plan:

- Youkai Hakkai (Saiyuki Reload) - probably the first convention this year, that I'm gonna attend
- Tenpou Gensui (Saiyuki Gaiden) - Funekai '09 (?)
- Ritsuka Ayoagi (Loveless) - must talk with Fusia about the term of hair-dying
- Kubota Makoto (Wild Adapter) - probably off the record (= not on cosplay gala)

I'm insane and thinking about loosing more weight to make my little dream come true - to cosplay Alita from "Battle Angel Alita" (aka GUNNM)

Update must be!

2009-03-15T16:11:38Z

Kufufufufufufu no FU

I had to update. HAD TO.

Since I got no Zen... I scanned the writing meme I've wanted to do. And since edyna posted hers, I'd stolen some courage from friends (XD) and did the meme.

I convinced my traditional-cuisine-loving father to eat sushi with me in Łódź. He told me that it was great, except the shrimp nigiri. But he ate octopus... xD
Miso soup is horrible. Do not want it again! D8<

Pointless journal #1

2009-01-18T20:11:36Z

I think I'm writting this to erease the previous "new year" thing.
Pointless, I know.

My friend brought me Pokemon Pearl and now I'm addicted.
Good thing is, that I can bring my dreams from the age of 12 come true and that I can live without net now xD
The same friend found today an another photo of me and KanaYozora cosplaying Saiyuki... I laughed hard from it, but he told me that we look great and very in character.

I wrote about my friend Pandora aka Konzen in my essay, that I must hold to my English teacher tomorrow. Gonna laugh my ass of it if he'll notice that Kana mentioned Pandora in her own essay some time ago.

6 days to my Prom. It's on Saturday and I got a nice green-black dress.
Now I'm trying to get used to walk in high-heels... Crap! *falls on the carpet*

I know that these are pointless informations for you all, my dear people who actually read this.

Greetings!

2008-12-31T15:26:06Z

I really don't know why am I doing this, but it obviously sounds like fun after all and I think that's my duty. Even if I know that nobody will send me a "happy new year" sms...
Well, screw it all.

Happy ~~Gay~~ New Year~!

And that's all, folks.
Now go party and drink lots of cheap russian champagne!

Crawls out of the darkness

2008-12-22T12:42:35Z

Yay, Yay, YAY~!

I was on "'Christmas' Second-Hand Gaiden Cosplay Shopping" today. With some help of course.
I really didn't have any hope to find a suitable shirt or a good plain black tie. But when Kana found a dull red shirt (near the bright yellow shirt) I began to dig through the shelves.
Then she found black Burton's tie and at the same time I found an ideal orange shirt.
Miracle?
And it's not the end of it!
I found a smock. Real, pure white doctor's over-coat from good quality thick cotton.
All things in one, good second-hand shop! It is probably our favourite one.

I'm very proud of us...

Last Friay I hurt my inner foot during ice-skating. Don't ask me how I did it... probably because the bad skates.
When I'll be letf home alone during my mother's shopping spree, I can smuggle digital camera into the room and take a few photos. I got full outfit 3 months before the planned cosplay!
I'm a genoius!
But nobody will read this journal anyway, so... lol xDDD

I'm really not in the mood to write it all in Polish. Must have over 87-90% from final Matura exam in English on advanced level, so I'm practicing.
Other issue is, that I'm writting it for self-satisfaction only...

And Merry Christmas!

Epic fail is Epic

2008-12-01T21:23:11Z

Because I can!

And because I got nothing to do today, really. No homoework (wut!?!), only 3 lazy lessons tomorrow. And a CRACK.
Obviously it has to be it.

So why not doing something insane?

I had to do it and I don't know why... Really.
Maybe because I got a headache right now?

The scretch is quite old and it was made in hurry, so that's why I didn't care much how it would look like being coloured.

The original one:
adi-san.deviantart.com/art/The-moment-of-CRACK-87358737

And the coloured one (click for bigger version this f*ck was edited about 15 times):
img141.imageshack.us/img141/2636/lolut3.png

And it was a moment of pure crack...

Thankyouverymuch!
*bows*

I will regret posting it...

2008-11-11T10:23:31Z

The folowing entry is mostly filled with photos. Do not look at it, if you don't want to.

Another conspiracy journal with edyna. Just because I washed my hair (Then again I felt like no posting my face here... Not today!) and I want to post GojyoPillow photos.
I had some free time to take photos in the morning, because my "student" canceled our english rehearsal lesson...
Yay the Polish Independence Day!

Saiyuki fans - comment Edyna's brilliant handcraft work!
My friends - impale me for another photo post. xD Or write my name in your personal DeathNote

This pillow was made for me by Edyna as a trade for random animu goodies.
Do not comment that it's my work plz.

This is how GojyoPillow looks like. He is so cuteee! And look at the awesome antennas!
I sleep with him since I got him via mail...

I chopped this photo to erase my face, lol. This is size comparison. I'm about 170cm (5,6 feet) tall.
Black blouse was chosen "just because"... look at Saiyuki manga to know why.

My favourite photo... x33 Made on my navy blue couch.
There's GojyoPillow with things from my cosplay outfit - tunic, sash ~~(aka The Floor-Cloth of Power)~~, headband and monocle. All of these was made a week before the convention... Now you know why I don't believe how I made it on time.
Outfit is very messy, very dirty and very cramped. Must wash and then iron it to wear in the future...

Now I must eat something NAO...
And a coffee, definately a coffee!

Haku comes to LJ

2008-11-10T18:55:57Z

I just remembered that I promised edyna to show her my plushie Hakuryuu...

Poor dragon was sewed in 3 ~~days~~ nights before the convention. Just because I was convinced to cosplay Cho Hakkai a week ~~(or half a week?)~~ before the actual event. God bless the sewing machine!
Still I wonder how I managed to do the full outfit cosplay... O_____O;

Two older photos of Haku were in very poor quality, because I made them by my cellphone. So now I managed to steal my mother's camera and play a bit with it.
Because I needed the quality.

The background: armchair near my desk and a sun-patterned curtain. All in my too small room.

Sitting on my armchair. It looks quite similar to when he's sitting on my arm.
Just bend the tail a bit around ones waist and voila, he's not falling! x3

Frontlook. Still on my armchair. I love his tiny ears!
Gosh, poor plushie is a bit dirty after so many hugs... He even was stolen by two fangirls... Same with the wings, gotta fix them soon. The dragon is very soft in touch, it's made of a velvet-like fabric. (Maybe velure? I don't remember.)

A shot of his sweet muzzle and the mane made of white, fluff feathers that cling to everything black around...
Oh no! ; o ; My armchair!! *starts cleaning it*

I just felt like posting it right here and right now.
Bite me.

</lj>

Let the apocalypse begin!

2008-10-27T16:02:56Z

Title (what title?): Sometimes
Fandom: Saiyuki (nu wai!)
Genre: contemplation drabble (>262 words)
Pairing: light hints of 58
Rating: PG , I think
Disclaimer: Saiyuki is not mine, unfortunately.
Warnings: AU; no beta (just MsWord); me as author

I need a ~~masochist~~ beta for all my writtings... really need it.

Sometimes

Sometimes he remembers.

The soft padding of old bed with rusting springs in its mattress, covered by rough, yellowed sheets. Those aimless little talks they made during all these too long nights. A smile of steel held towards the shameless irony and joke. The washed and mended socks and the favourite book, he’d read so many times that he knows its plot by heart. Bitter taste in too dry mouth. Smell of stale beer and cigarettes’ smoke, swamping the room and clinging to the pile of laundry. Swamping also his heart, making him surrender to memories and clumsy feelings.

Sometimes he forgets.

Previous life’s tough journey. Loud and pointless quarrels, that lasted ten minutes, a day, a week and so. Sleepless nights spent watching him sleep after healing all deep wounds he’d got during one of the fights. Long hours of waiting for him to come home late at night. And even longer time spent in heart-piercing silence, drowning in self-guilt.

All the things he forgets with one smile of his.

Sometimes he wants it to come back. But it’s gone.

And then he opens his eyes, sitting on the park bench. Unknown, but familiar face above him. Its owner stares at him and smiles a bit uncertain.

“Do I know you?” – a question in a recognisable tune of voice. That’s when he decides to smile back at the stranger. A perfect and loving smile, making the man in front of him shudder with cheerful laugh.

He remembers. The past can be retrieved, renamed, rewritten...

“Let’s go, shall we?”

English issues

2008-10-23T19:50:31Z

My English teacher said that I have to write more...
But no essays, no letters and no reviews.

And as "English teacher" I certainly don't mean this mere parody in persona of UnitG, that I have in school. I know we all love him for his unblivelably GAY fashion sense... oh, you know what I'm talking about.

I have to write more ~~porn~~ stories. The usage of adjectives and combining all human senses in 250 words.
How I will manage to do it? For me 250 words is merely a "beginning of a beginning". <WhatTheHell?!>
I will write drabbles in English from now on. Haters - do not read. Those who'll manage to do so - thank you very, very much my dear bunch of sweet fluffy bunnies. I really appreciate every form of your support.

I think that I don't really know what I'm writing here, because headache is killing me off. Somehow I don't want to take pills for it. Damn the weather that causes it! And inability of writing short stories instead of highly-detailed descriptions.
I should be watching House MD now. It's on the tv, so right next to me... Doesn't matter that I'd probably watched this episode about 3 times.
No, hold on! Wait..!
I should be sleeping right now!

Thank God teachers are off on a trip and I've got just two lessons tomorrow.

From dust....

2008-10-09T19:45:50Z

...to a new life

Thanks to edyna's friend I finally got a nice layout.
OMGTHANKYOUVERYMUCH~!
But I've changed some details like frames in comments and almost all fonts, sorry.

Well. I got nothing really interesting to say now. I applied for some cool communities and it's enough for me.
You got all things written on my dArt, so go check it out.

And I still have to write english essay for my friend, Diane...

Now let my mind die seeing 58mpreg art.

What am I doing here?

2008-09-22T13:09:53Z

This is the question!

I promised myself not to have such thing like LifeJournal. I failed miserably.
Still I really don't know why I'm writing this stuff and so on, maybe because I'm sick and on meds right now... and bored.
Definitely because of this.

I got no layout and I know it well.
I'm such a lazy-ass that I can't learn(?!) how to provide/write cascade style sheet (CSS). I'm a dork. A ~~child of Neostrada~~ person who writes Html codes in WordPad (Notatniku przybywaj!). User of PhotoshopCS and Corel Photopaint11 who don't know how to paint in them. Good that I can manage to create some avatars/icons for personal use. Now I'm gonna make more of them.
God thank you that post writting here bases on html. I'm in heaven!

Still I would like this LJournal to look like my Mylog, which I made from zero.

I also would like to thank Edine and her friend for the future help with layout.
Because I'm so green in CSS.

Owari